Ryan and I enjoy watching TV together- our favorite thing to do after the girls are in bed is cuddle up and watch some thing that will make us laugh. A few years ago a favorite show was Til Death with Brad Garrett (who plays Robbie in the show Everybody Loves Raymond).
Well in this show (which has gotten really dumb I must admit and we dont' really watch it- it's tooootally jumped the shark-literally) Eddie (BG's charecture) has a friend who ...Well let's just say spanking and weird punishments turn him on. He's a sad twisted person dating another really sad twisted person. I find the story line down right disturbing. But it was interesting to see because it tied some thigns together for me...
First read this: The Spencer Spanking Plan (I posted from that blog)
It is a product of today--an act of discipline given under carefully defined and controlled conditions. Brutality is entirely foreign to the idea. Revenge, oppression, force and violence are all frowned upon and do not enter into the Plan in any way.
The idea of a modern spanking is to administer punishment when it is needed--then make up and forget the whole incident.
Establish causes that will produce the discipline.
Agree upon the matter thoroughly. Don't leave the thing to the whim of the moment.
A modern spanking is not a dreadful thing to endure. It hurts a little, of course. It has to hurt to be effective. But there is no danger to it. The temporary hurt is beneficial--it gives them just the lesson they need--and when it is over, THE TROUBLE IS OVER.
2.--Care must be taken not to bruise the flesh, raise welts or injure the body in any way. The punishment should continue long enough, however, to be truly effective and to impart a beneficial lesson.
3.--A spanking must never be administered in anger. Wait until both parties are calm and it can be carried out properly.
9.---The punishment should be inflicted upon the bare skin. In no other way can a careful check be kept on the progress of the spanking or whipping. Remember, the idea of modern corporal punishment is to sting the flesh effectively, without cutting or harming it in any way. To do the job intelligently, therefore, a constant scrutiny of the skin MUST be maintained. A spanking or whipping administered over clothing--even a thin, single garment is "blind punishment." It may be altogether too severe, or not severe enough.
A question many people ask, when first taking up modern discipline, is: "How long should a spanking last? About how many slaps should be given?"
There can be no definite answer to such a question. I do not recommend any certain stated number of slaps. The idea is always to continue the spanking until you believe it has been effective-without at any time resorting to unnecessary harshness or uncalled for severity.
It has been found that comparatively mild slapping, applied to the buttocks, can be made to sting effectively, without doing one particle of damage or leaving any evidence of unpleasant, harsh treatment. The object is to sting the flesh--make the whole spanking surface hot and tender--so that the repeated application of the descending hand is severe enough to make the recipient realize she is really being disciplined.
When a spanking is to be given, the wife is directed to go to her room and get ready. This means she is to undress and wait up in her room until her husband comes up to discipline her.
When her husband enters the room there should be no delay in carrying out the discipline. She must not argue about the matter--beg to be let off--or show any sign of resentment. She must obey without a word.
It is best not to say a single word during this period.
The wife should quietly place herself across her husband's lap--after he seats himself on the edge of the bed. Holding her in place, in the age-old spanking position, he begins spanking her. His duty is to do a thorough job-- taking the utmost pains to do it right.
The spanking over--and still without speaking--the husband should let his wife up, then quietly leave the room.
It's the wife's duty--after dressing and drying her tears (if the spanking has provoked any) to go to her husband then, thank him for administering the discipline--and kiss him.
If this seems hard to do, you have lost the true spirit of the Plan and you must MAKE YOURSELF DO IT in order to win it back!
Friendly relations should then be immediately re-established.
Read the blog posters conclusion HERE
It was shocking for me to read that, as a parent who has read a few of Dobson's books they are almost word for work what he recommends when spanking.
Onto the Sexual Effects of Spanking- I found this blog post interesting. It's a sad and twisted situation...I don't have time to go into this more indepth- i'm exhasuted and going to lay down a bit before entering the fay that will be this afternoon.